Facebook Hiatus

I recently decided to take a break from Facebook.  I know!  How will I ever survive?  However, it's been a week and guess what?  I'm still here...and functioning!  In fact, I can't believe the freedom there is in not being on Facebook.  I was getting stressed out and worried about stupid things.  It was terrible!  I decided I needed a break, and it was definitely the right decision.  I just deactivated my account.  Maybe, at some point, I'll be back.  Right now, I'm just enjoying the peace that came with taking a break.

The bad thing about quitting, yes there is some bad, is that I miss posting about what's going on with me and my life.  Not for anybody else, but I love to have those memories recorded where I can go back and kinda relive them.  So, I've decided to start up my blog again...I mean it's only been a year :-0.

So, this will look a lot different than before.  I'm hoping to set some goals, share what I'm reading and watching as well as some God thoughts and family moments.  I'm not the best at carving out time, so here's hoping I can continue.

So, are you feeling overwhelmed and stressed out?  Well, why not try taking a brief hiatus from Facebook.  You may just be surprised at the difference it makes.  If not, well, you can always reactivate your account.  The process is super simple, you simply log back on.  I know, because of all the apps I use that was tied to my Facebook account.  I think I had to reactivate and deactivate 3-4 times already.  Oh the things you don't think of......

A Year of Heartache, Triumphs, Struggles, and Great Faith

Everyday, first thing I do, is read my Timehop.  If you're not sure what Timehop is, you can click here to check it out.  Usually, I love reading about previous years.  It usually sparks a memory and a smile.  Today...not so much.  Today, I read these...

It brought back so many memories.  The phone call from my mom saying that my sister, Kim, was getting worried because she hadn't heard from Joe.  Then the frantic phone call just a short time later saying he had collapsed at the gym and had been taken to the hospital.  I remember rushing to my sisters so that I could be with her kids, my precious nieces and nephew that were just 4, 3, and a little over a year old.

I remember the phone call with my brother where he said he talked to a friend that was a nurse and that it didn't sound good.  Then my mom calling, saying they thought he was dying.  I remember going up to my nieces' room, their sweet pink room, kneeling at a white bench they have there and weeping and praying that God would spare Joe's life.

God did spare Joe's life and the journey of the past year began.  It's been a long year, especially for my sister and her kids, but it's been a good year as well.  There have been ups and downs and sometimes the downs were really low, but God has been faithful every step of the way.

Kim and I are probably closer than ever, which I am very thankful for.  Her strength and her faith inspire me every day.  Her love and care of Joe is amazing to watch.  That man owes her big time when he's up and about :)

And he will be up and about.  God has promised it.  We so long for that day.  Look forward to that day.  My sister, more than any of us, I'm sure.

What a morning that will be!  When I get to wake up to a Timehop with a reminder that one year ago, Joe was completely healed!

Until then, we continue each day leaning heavily on God and His faithfulness.  I've been thankful for this year.  I'm thankful for so much time that I've got to spend with my nieces and nephew.  I'm thankful for long talks with my sister where I get to encourage her and she, so many times, encourages me.  I'm thankful for a mom that is willing to sacrifice almost every spare moment she has to help my sister and make this time easier.

Most of all, I'm thankful for a God that understands.  A God that has been there every step of the way.  Through every tear.  Through every smile.  Through every single moment.  We could not have made it through the past year without God in the midst of it.  So thankful that we didn't even have to try.  His hand has been in this from the beginning and He will see us through.

#Intentional2015

Last year, towards the end of the year, we were challenged at prayer meeting to come up with a word for the year.  It could really be anything, just something God had for you or wanted to do for you or in you, really....anything.  Well, the word God gave me was Grace.  Allowing me to offer myself grace and also offering grace to others.  While I am still learning and growing, I can look back and see what an amazing work God has done in my life over the past year and especially His work around the concept of Grace in my life.

For 2015 I decided to stick with the concept.  I usually do resolutions which I struggle through.  Most don't get fulfilled or they get partially fulfilled.  In any case, I never feel good about them when I look back over the year.  So, if I can pick a word, or if God can give me a word, then I can look and see how I've grown over the past year as it pertains to that word.

Well, my word for 2105 is Intentional.  God wants me to be more intentional with my life.  At first, I thought it was just going to be about my time, which I guess is true.  God told me that the one thing He wants from me this year is to figure out my schedule.  I have so much going on and it can be easy to get lost in all of the 'to do's.'  I'll end up not spending time with my kids, not reading, not resting.  All those things are way too important to miss out on.

As I was accepting this word of Intentional, I began to realize just how much of my life it was going to affect.  I need to be intentional about going to bed on time so that I can get up early so that I intentionally have at least an hour, if not more, to spend to with God in the morning.  I have to be intentional about getting up on time because if I get up late my entire day feels off and I get rushed in my time with God.  I have to be intentional about my calendar.  Yes, I finally broke down and bought a paper calendar so that I can schedule my days.  It's amazing how much more productive I am and therefore end up with more free time when I specifically schedule my days.  I have to be intentional about eating healthy and working out.  I need to be physically fit so that I can do all that God has called me to do and be able to do it for a long time!  I have to be intentional about shutting off the TV and reading at night and spending time with my kids.  Doug and I are going to be intentional about getting away a couple of times this year so that our marriage is strong.  It doesn't have to be fancy for us to just enjoy being together.

Those are my beginning thoughts of being intentional.  I'm sure it's going to invade even more of my life as the year progresses, and that's ok.  I know that this year is going to be an amazing year and I want to do everything I can to be ready for it.  Being intentional in every aspect of my life will help that to happen.

So, you'll see me post some things on facebook with #intentional2015.  It'll be great to click on that at the end of the year and see all the ways I was intentional.  No looking back and feeling like I failed at my resolutions once again but being able to look back and see what God did in my life as I intentionally lived more fully for Him in 2015.

Why not join me?  Pick a work, or steal mine!  I'm sure we all could use some more intentionality in our lives.

Jesus is the Light of the World

I started an Advent reading plan last week.  I honestly didn't even think about it until my pastor asked in a meeting if anybody had started one and then we talked about advent at prayer meeting as well.  When I started my devotional time on Friday, I really felt like that's where God wanted me to go, so I chose one from YouVersion.  There are a ton of options available, so it was easy to find one that fit with what I was looking for.

This morning, the reading was on Jesus being the light of the world.  It said to think about some of the scientific knowledge you have about light and see how that fits with Jesus being the Light of the World.  Well, for those that know me, you know that science is not my strong point, so I googled some facts.  I came across these at Factmonster.com.  It's amazing to think of them not only from the standpoint of Jesus being the light of the world but that he calls us to be a light in our part of the world as well.

• Light carries energy from a source -  Jesus was able to do all that He did because He was "sourced" by God.  He was in perfect relationship with God.  As for me, I could not get through a day without Jesus.  He is my source.  

• Light never bends - Jesus never strayed from His mission on earth.  He was all about bringing glory to the Father.  He could not veer off of that path.  I have to keep my eyes on Jesus.  I have to strive to do what He has called me to do and I cannot let anything or others distract me.

• Some objects transmit light better than others, like a transparent object - Jesus was not about Himself, He was all about doing His Father's business.  I have to be all about Jesus.  The less of me there is, the more Jesus others will see.

• Some objects do not make light themselves, but appear bright because they reflect the light from the source - Jesus was all about reflecting God.  Showing God's love and mercy to others.  I cannot be about making myself appear "important."  I have to be all about reflecting Jesus so others see Him in me and because of me.

• Light travels in a straight line, if anything gets in its way, it casts a shadow - Jesus did not let anything come between Him and His Father.  I have to make Jesus my number one priority in my life.  I cannot let anything come between me and him, no matter what it may be, or it will cast a shadow in my life.  A dark space where the enemy will try to take root.

I'm no scientist, but I loved these pictures.  I never really thought about why we hang up Christmas lights.  I'm sure for some, it's just a way to decorate for the holiday.  However, from now on, for me, it will be a reminder that Jesus was born a baby at Christmastime so that He may be the Light of the World.  It will also be a reminder that I am called to the same thing.  May I be a light.  Right here.  Right now.

Taking my hand

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do not fear; I will help you.  ~  Isaiah 41:13

The first time I read this verse, it didn't strike me nearly as much as when I read it the second time.  It was as if God had me pause and think about what a beautiful picture this is.

How often do we do this with our own children?  If the path is uneven, we reach and take their hand.  If it's dark and they're unsure, we reach and take their hand.  If we're crossing a busy street where there is a possibility of danger, we reach and take their hand.

This is so different from  the times when they reach out to us.  It's us, wanting to comfort, to protect, to offer assurance to them when we see things in their path that perhaps they don't see coming.

Oh how many times God has done this for us!  Oh how many times He has done this for us and we don't even realize it.  God is in control.  He knows what is coming long before we do.  There is nothing we have to face alone.  He is there, ready to reach out to us, to take our hands and help us along.  To offer His peace, His assurance, His strength along the way.

Facing the Fiery Furnace

Trials and struggles.  We all face them.  We all go through them.  It can seem that sometimes we go through them more than others or ours are somehow harder then others.  In any case, they are never fun.  They are never easy.  Doug and I are in that season now.  It's been a rough several months.  Mostly it's due to finances.  It's amazing how one simple thing, money, can get you down so fast and for so long.  It's also amazing how it can affect so many other areas in your life.  But, it doesn't have to be money.  There are all kinds of different struggles and trials that people go through.  It's different for everybody, and yet somehow the same.  It's still a struggle.  It's still something that can be scary, hard, seemingly impossible to get through.

I was reading in Daniel today about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego.  King Nebuchadnezzar built a huge statue and wanted his entire kingdom to bow down and worship it.  Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego refused.  In fact, here are their exact words to King Nebuchadnezzar:

  "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty's hand.  But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." 
(Daniel 3:17-18 NIV)

"The God we serve is able to deliver us."  Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego knew God was able to deliver them.  Do I have that much faith when I face struggles, whatever they may be?  Do I have complete and utter faith in my God's ability to handle any and every situation that I face?

I love the next line "But even if he does not."  Even if he doesn't, they will stand firm.  They will still follow. They will still trust.  How hard that can be.  God always provides during our struggles, it's just that sometimes His ways are not our ways!  He might not help us avoid them.  He might not make them any easier.  He might just want us to get thrown into them.  But here's the next part of the story:

  and these three men, firmly tied, fell into the blazing furnace.  Then King Nebuchadnezzar leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, "Weren't there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?"  They replied, "Certainly, Your Majesty."  He said, "Look!  I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods."   (Daniel 3:23-25 NIV)

As soon as they were thrown into the fire, King Nebuchadnezzar saw four men.  You see, Jesus was already in the fire waiting for them.  It sometimes can seem like God has abandoned me when I start walking into struggles.  I oftentimes want God to shield me from pain.  Keep me from hardships. I want our life to be smooth and easy.  But that's just not how life works.  But, God has already gone before me.  He knows my struggles even before I face them.  He's already in them, ready to embrace me, love me, guide me through.  He might not shield me from trials and struggles, but he never abandons me in them.  He's right in the middle of them!

I think this next line is my favorite of the whole story:

  Nebuchadnezzar then approached the opening of the blazing furnace and shouted, "Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, servants of the Most   High God, come out!  Come here!"  So Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego came out of the fire, and the satraps, prefects, governors and royal advisers crowded around them.  They saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their ropes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them.  (Daniel 3:26-27 NIV)

There wasn't even the smell of fire on them!  God is so amazing!  He can bring us through, whatever we are going through, so fully, so completely.  He stands with us.  He stands for us.  In fact, He brings us through so completely, that all people can see is that God was with us.  Is that how I face my struggles?  That when I come out on the other side people will know that God got me through.  Am I able to give him praise and glory for all He has done and have people believe me because of how I handled a difficult time?

It can be so easy to get discouraged, to give up.  It's not wrong to get discouraged.  What's important is to get my focus back on God.  Back to the God who is with me and will never leave me; so that when I come out on the other side, I'll be able to point to God, give Him all the glory.  The result, not only am I stronger, closer to God, but others will be inspired, encouraged, maybe even changed because of what I went through.

That's the beauty in a struggle.  God glorified.  Lives changed.  First mine.  Then, quite possibly, other's.

20 Years!

20 years ago today I married the most amazing man on the planet.

Wow!  I can't believe I even get to type that right now.  First, I don't know how I'm old enough to have been married 20 years :)  Second, is that unfortunately, so many marriages don't make it to this point.

At this point in my life, I've lived with Doug more than I've lived without him.  I honestly cannot even remember life without him and really don't want to.  Now, I would love to sit here and say that the last 20 years have been all fairy tales and roses, but that's just not the case.  We've had our tough times, like everybody does.  But, I can sit here today and say that the word Divorce has never came up.  We chose in the beginning to make this work.  Sometimes it's been easy, sometimes it's been a fight.  But if there's something worth fighting for, than it has to be your spouse.  Your family.

To be honest, I married Doug because I knew he was going to be an amazing father.  I was right.  Now, though, I realize how much more there is to being an amazing spouse than just being good to our kids.  It's like he completes me.  Now, I know that's one of the most cheezy things to say, but it's true.  Doug is everything I'm not.  He balances me in a way that makes me a better person.  Now, sometimes it drives me crazy, but I know it's what I need in my life.

He's my support. My rock.  I know he will steadfastly be there for me no matter what.  He loves me unconditionaly.  It has taken me a long time and a lot of work to realize that he's with me for good.  He loves me that much.

I am so amazed at the man he is.  I am so proud of the growth I've seen in him.  He's allowing God to work in him in mighty ways.  With the work he's done to make himself better, along with the work I've done to make myself better, it's no wonder how much our marriage is thriving right now.  I love him more today than ever.  There's no one I would rather spend my day with.  No one I would rather share my thoughts with.  I'm so blessed that I get to call him husband.

We've been blessed with three of the most amazing kids on the planet.  I know that a huge part of that is Doug.  Having a dad that loves you.  That wants to spend time with you.  That's so huge!  I could not ask for a better dad for my children.

So, I just want to say that I love you babe.  More today than ever before.  Thanks for putting up with me.  I know I was not always the easiest person to live with, but you have stayed by me through thick and through thin.  I can't believe the life we get to live.  I'm so excited for the next 20 years.  I know that with God so firmly in the center, they're going to be unmatchable.  God has placed us here, together.  There's is no one I would rather be on this journey we call life with than you.  I love you so much.  More than I can ever put into words.