Never Wavering?

I was reading in John 10 today and it struct me how confident and sure Jesus was. Take a look:

17 “Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. 18 No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.”

He's so confident about laying down his life. He knows about the cross and he's fine with it. But, take a look at Gethsemane just a short time later:

36 Then Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to the disciples, “Sit here while I go and pray over there.” 37 And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed. 38 Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me.”
39 He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”
40 Then He came to the disciples and found them sleeping, and said to Peter, “What! Could you not watch with Me one hour? 41 Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
42 Again, a second time, He went away and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if this cup cannot pass away from Me unless[a] I drink it, Your will be done.” 43 And He came and found them asleep again, for their eyes were heavy.
44 So He left them, went away again, and prayed the third time, saying the same words. 45 Then He came to His disciples and said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Behold, the hour is at hand, and the Son of Man is being betrayed into the hands of sinners. 46 Rise, let us be going. See, My betrayer is at hand.”

Jesus was exceeding sorrowful, even to the point of death! He prayed three times that he wouldn't have to endure the cross. Oh how I can see myself in this. I'm so confident right now. Our house is up for sell and once it sells, we're moving, whether Doug has a job or not. I'm excited to just step out in faith and see how God's going to work. Right now. How am I going to feel when it actually comes time for Doug to quit his job and he doesn't have one there? I'm pretty sure I'm going to have my doubts. I'm going to be asking God for another way right up until then. I mean, once we get an offer on our house and we put in an offer over there, He'll have about a month to work. He can bring about a job during that time. But what if He doesn't?

You know, I know God can handle our questions. He can handle our doubt. I think He can even handle our unbelief as long as we're crying out "Lord help my unbelief." What he cannot tolerate is disobedience. If we look him in the eye and say "yes Lord" and then turn around and do something else, what kind of faith is that? We cannot be surface Christians. God wants more than that. What does He say to the church of Laodicea?

Revelation 3:16
So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth.

So, I'm bringing God my fears. What else am I supposed to do with them? He knows they're there. I cannot hide them from Him. He wants me to bring them to Him. Right now it's not so bad. They creep up every once in awhile. But as we get closer, I know they are going to surround me. During that time I know I will be in prayer a lot. What better place to be than at the feet of Jesus allowing Him to work in me. The best thing is is that I know there's going to be a time when I get to look back and be like "Wow! Look how Jesus just worked everything out!" What an amazing day that will be.