Her First Sleep Over

Jazlyn spent the night with a friend for the first time night before last. It's not surprising that it's her first time since she's only three! She was just going to play for the afternoon, which extended to after supper and then to all night. I was very surprised that she stayed. But of course I forgot one very important thing

EMMA

Emma is Jazlyn's best friend. It is so funny to think of a three year old with a best friend, but it's true. She talks about her all the time. She wants to dress like her whenever they're going to be together. I actually have to lie and say "Yes, that's what Emma's wearing" when we leave for church. I made the mistake of making them matching outfits, now they're hooked :)

I dread moving and separating them. It's the first time I have honestly felt any qualms. I hate the idea of leaving my bible study girls and my small group. I'm really going to miss my church. But, I'm ok with all that. Jazlyn leaving Emma, well that's harder to take. They're just so precious together!

I guess what's so hard is that because she's so young, she's more than likely going to forget all about this first friendship after a time. That's just really hard to take. They love each other soooo much. They get in trouble and have to be separated at tumbling. When they're not separated, they are sitting next to each other. If there's no room beside one of them, the other will just stand and stare at whoever is sitting by the one sitting down until that person moves. It's so funny how all the kids understand that Emma and Jazlyn sit next to each other. They hug and hold hands. They're just so adorable. And I don't think there's anything better than a couple of 3-4 year olds carrying a conversation!

The good thing is that I know God has friends for each of us in Indiana. I've also talked to Gretchen and let her know that we expect a lot of visits! Until we move, we're doing more than ever together. I don't know if that's a good plan or not, but that's what I'm doing. Next on the list is a princess tea on Sunday. I can't wait!

What do my Actions Say?

Matthew 11:2-5

And when John had heard in prison about the works of Christ, he sent two of his disciples and said to Him, “Are You the Coming One, or do we look for another?”
Jesus answered and said to them, “Go and tell John the things which you hear and see: The blind see and the lame walk; the lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear; the dead are raised up and the poor have the gospel preached to them.

John wanted to know if Jesus was the Christ. Isn't it just like Jesus to not just say "yes." Instead he basically says "look at my actions." Look at my actions and decide for yourself who you think I am.

What are my actions like? Do people have to ask if I'm a Christian, or can they look at my life, see the fruit I bare and say "there's something different about her." I know that I'm not perfect. I'm not going to look and act like Jesus all of the time. But those times should not be the norm. Every thing I do, every thought I have, everything about me should show who I am. I am a child of God.

My reading this morning ties in perfectly with the sermon yesterday. Pastor Dale talked about the fig tree Jesus saw when he was hungry yet it didn't have any fruit on it. Jesus cursed it and it withered and died. Jesus expects us to bare fruit that looks like him. It's not an option. It's not a Sunday thing. It's an everyday, every moment thing. It's a life changing thing. It's being transformed from the inside out. It's not an overnight thing, however. It's a process that won't be complete until we get to heaven. But we need to be on that journey, taking steps day by day. Slowing being transformed to look and act like Jesus. Lord, Help me to do that today!

How Many Hairs do I Have?

Matthew 10:30 "But the very hairs of your head are numbered"

I don't know how many strands of hair I have. I do know that some fall out every day and every day more start growing in. It is an ever changing number. Yet God knows that number every minute and every second of the day. Do you think God cares how many strands of hair I have? Do you think he keeps a log with that ever changing number always kept up to date? I don't think so. I think the bible tells us this to show us how intimately and how thoroughly God knows us. No one knows us like God knows us.

Why then do I try to hide my fears, my mistakes, my shame from Him? He already knows everything even more completely than I think I do. Why do I not come to Him and allow Him the healing, the comfort, the forgiveness, the peace that He so anxiously awaits to give me? Dr Phil always says "you can't change something that you won't admit." This is so very true with God. He can't do the work in us He needs to do until we admit that there is no way we can do it on our own.

You know what, not only does He know us so completely, so thoroughly, but He loves us anyway! Thank you Lord! Next time I have to pick a hair off my sweater or coat, I'm going to take a moment and think that it's an example of God's love for me.

Missing my Kids

Doug came home a couple of months ago and said he had an idea. I always cringe when this happens. His ideas usually do not excite me like they do him. He said he had a conference up near Chicago and thought I could come with him. Well, this was something I could get excited about! I talked to my mom and she agreed to take a couple of days off and stay with my kids.

Well, we've been gone since Sunday and head back today. I can't believe how much I miss my kids. I mean, I knew I would miss them, but really thought I would enjoy the time away. Doug and I came up early on Sunday and walked around the mall here. It was a joke of a mall. For every store that was open there were two that were closed. They did have an indoor mini golf course. I was like "Mini golf." Then we just kept walking. It just didn't sound as fun without the kids. We thought about going to see a movie but the only one we wanted to see was Rango and didn't want to see it without the kids. We then went to Target and walked around. We spent the most time in the toy aisle.

The kids on the other hand are not missing us at all. To my surprise, Jazz is doing just fine. I knew she would be ok, but I thought there would be some issues. I mean she still sleeps with us, so I thought at the very least she would miss us at bed time. NOPE! She's doing just fine. I'm glad. It would be so much worse if she was miserable.

So, I'm going to enjoy my last day here, but am so ready to hug my kids! When they start driving me crazy, and they will, I'm going to remember how much worse it would be if we weren't all together!

The Ice Cream Truck

The music from the ice cream truck. The kids can hear it from blocks away! They come running in yelling "The ice cream truck!" I remember the same feeling when I was kid. I loved getting ice cream from the ice cream truck. I also remember being upset when we couldn't get anything. Any time I can, I allow the kids to get something. It's kinda hard during the summer when it comes through almost everyday. It can be especially hard with our ice cream truck. The prices are horrible! You pay for one popsicle what you could get a whole box for at the store. The other problem is the driver. They are just not kid friendly. I went out with Jazz once and he had a cigarette hanging out of his mouth while he helped us. Yeah! Nice! My neighbor refuses to support them and her kids aren't ever allowed to get anything. While I don't like supporting them, I love the memories for my kids. So, when they hear the music and come running, I grab my wallet and smile. Why? Because I'm making my kids smile and that is enough for me!

Princess Dress

I finally made a dress that I've been thinking about for over a year. It's different than what I first envisioned, but I LOVE the final product. Jazz does too. She was so excited when I showed it to her. She wore it for 2 hours after I took her picture in it.

Earlier that day, we had went to Walmart. She had $5 from Valentine's Day that she had not spent, so I let her pick out a toy. She picked out one of the tiny Disney princess dolls. She was showing her to me and I told her "she has her ball gown on." She did not understand what a "ball gown" was. She said "a bouncy ball?" I explained to her that a "Ball" was a dance the people went to and that you would wear a fancy dress called a ball gown. Well, when she was wearing her dress, she kept trying to get Austin to dance with her. It was so cute!

After two hours, she finally took it off. She was then running around with it, so I took it away from her and told her she had to be careful with her fancy dress. Laid it over the back of the chair and there's BBQ sauce on the front. UGH! Well, I guess I get to see how well it'll wash! I think I'm going to make shoes to match it today. I can't wait for her to wear it on Easter Sunday!

Twinkle Toes

Jazzy has wanted a pair of Sketcher's Twinkle Toes for a long time. Well, at least since she saw them on Emma. They are sparkly pink and have jewels that light up when she walks. I mean, what's not to love! Well, they're $40. I tried to get them last month when I could have bought one pair of shoes and got the second one half off, but the store, of course, did not have her size. Well, yesterday, I had to get Austin a new pair of shoes. Side note - had to buy him a size 10, which is the same size that Doug wears! Anyway, while we were at the mall, we went into Journey Kidz. They had the shoes, so I had to buy them for her. Funny thing is, I was just at Journey's getting Austin's shoes and saw a pair of shoes that I really liked, but they were $40. I really didn't want to spend $40 on shoes for myself, so I didn't get them. I didn't have a problem, 5 minutes later, spending $40 on shoes for Jazz. Oh, what you do for your kids.

I was so excited to give them to her when we got home. I had her open the box and she said "light up shoes!" She immediately put them on and was running around the house in them. She loved them! I knew she would. Fast forward to bed time. She wanted to wear them to bed. I told her no. She then threw a fit, crying hysterically for about half an hour. I finally gave her one so she could sleep with it, but not put it on. She stopped crying as hard, but was still crying. I finally gave her the other one as well. She still cried and said "but my feet are so cold." She ended up not going to sleep for over an hour! Austin got her up this morning and the first thing she wanted was her shoes. She came upstairs ready to put them on with only her diaper on. All in all, totally worth the $40!

Psalm 119:105

Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.

I have been involved with a lady's bible study for four years now. I love this group of ladies and learn so much from them on a week to week basis. Yesterday, Lyn shared some thoughts that were just profound to me so I wanted to share. Some of this is what she had shared and other parts are from what God spoke to me.

I have been praying this verse often in our journey to Fishers. Specifically, I've been praying for God to light our path, show us our path. Lyn shared yesterday something that Pastor Dale had shared with her about this verse. Take a step back and really look at this verse. If God is lighting our path, than what does that mean? It means that we are surrounded by darkness. Darkness, Satan, everything that is against us is all around us. Often times, God does not show us the whole picture. We so many times do not understand what we are going through, why things are or are not happening. That's because God chooses not to reveal everything to us.

Isaiah 55:8-9

For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.


God does not think like us or act like us. Why? Because he can see the whole picture. Why does he not reveal more to us, because we cannot handle it. The entire picture is way too scary, too overwhelming, too....everything. God gives us what we need for this day, for this season. He lights our path just enough. Not too little. Not too much. But just perfectly. He gives us glimpses when we need them, and allows us to walk in pure faith at other times. We do not need to fear the darkness around us. He lights our path for this moment, and it's more than enough.